
I am feeling torn apart and inside out after reading a blog that I have been following.
For a little while now I have been reading
It is her painful story of her life and what she has been enduring since that terrible night.
After reading her blog, I was overwhelmed at the amount of courage she has shown in these past days and months.
Her own words on Tuesday, April 1, 2008:
"It is sinking in deeper and deeper that he is really gone. He isn't coming back. I always knew this mentally but it is now really hitting emotionally. I am really doing this by myself. I am really living a life without him. Years and years seem to stretch before me now and all I can feel about them is that he won't be there to share them with me. I will always be alone. Always missing and loving someone who I can't see, feel, hear or touch."
But in these past few months I have read about her struggles and her feelings and I thought that she was really starting to adjust to her painful new life, a little bit at a time. Her putting her true feelings in her blog has seemed, to me anyway, that it was helping her to cope slowly and one day at a time.
And then today I visited her blog and read this:
"Locking it Up
So, the inevitable has happened. Someone from "real life" has started reading this blog and got mad about its contents, so I have to lock it up. That makes me sad because I have connected with so many widows with young families through this blog and have had a safe place to vent, rage, think, and reflect on things. We have shared each others lives with each other- the good and the bad. Shared our hopes and our not so nice thoughts. Through it all I have been honest.
But I just had a very sad conversation with the friend I have been writing about lately, and well, this blog was used against me. If I am going to continue to have a safe place that I can be honest and share my journey with other people going down the same horrible road, I should not censor myself.
If you want to continue reading please either leave your email in the comments or email me directly @----------
I will leave this post up until June 7 and then I will be locking it up.Edit to add: if you email me, be sure to take out the spaces in the email address.
I am overwhelmed already by all the positive emails and comments. Makes me feel a little better after the incredibly horrible day. Grandma came and picked up the kids so that I can cry it all out- the loss of this blog and the loss of the friendship. Thank you."
How very sad for this brave young lady who was only trying to work through her grief by blogging her true feelings and thoughts.
So my friends, my question to you is, would you feel that you would have to make *your* blog private if someone you knew disapproved or was not happy with what you were trying to say in your own words?